I looked at my son who started High School this year today and wondered why I was missing him so much. He’s got a head full of maths and science revision, a uniform that looks like he’s been through a hedge backwards and a shy, almost teenage smile. And I miss him.
I miss the baby that he was and I miss the little boy who I ferried to school in the car or on a wobbly bike ride every day for the last six years.
Why do I miss him so much?
Because it was during these car journeys or during these wobbly bike rides (“I said STOP AT THE KERB”) that we would talk. And I mean really talk. The kind of talking you do when you don’t have to look at the other person, the kind of talking that’s easy to do and that’s when you put your world to rights.
Nowadays my son waits for a knock at the front door, pulls his school bag over his shoulder, grabs his lunch money and he’s gone – shambling up the street with his mates without so much as a backwards glance. My morning slots have gone. My afternoons of ‘How was your day?’ don’t have the same space, the same solid regularity.
Yes, we still talk – but it’s not the same. Timing is all.
Every day, at around about the same time, a little email pops into my inbox from the mighty Copyblogger. It could be a list of top tips for writing killer headlines, it could something along the lines of the marvellously titled “5 Things Depeche Mode Can Teach You About Effective Content Marketing”, it could be a free WordPress theme to download or a link to their latest podcast. No matter what it is, a large part of the reason that I am such an avid follower of the site is that I always receive their emails at about the same time of day. They’re like clockwork. And I always read them.
A large part of being a writer is making a regular space for your writing. It’s about making yourself open so that ideas and inspiration can flow. It’s the same for reading – and for talking. Making space in your life for communication, whether it’s between yourself and your ideas, yourself and your inbox or yourself and your family, time – and timing – is everything.
How do you make time to communicate in your life?
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Yes, you’re so right – it is all about timing. Your honesty about missing the journey to school has hit a nerve with me, we both love our cycle-rides to school and reading your words I could almost feel how much I will miss them even though there are still a couple of years to go. I found it quite unsettling so you must have communicated your feelings really well. Making time for communicating through writing is something I have only just started to do ( I started my blog about a month ago) and its becoming a pleasure to sit, think and communicate. I find the evenings seem to be the best time to get my ideas flowing but maybe that is just because I work best with a deadline
Really enjoyed your post Katherine, thank you.
Amazing!